The Claw Returns!

Loyal followers,

I know you all must be shocked to hear from me. Some of you didn't think I could break out of that dank cell they were keeping me in - and it's true, the rubber band around my claw was a roadblock for some time there.
And yet behold! It is I, The Claw, returned from my internment in the middle of the desert!
How did I do it?
Simple, Clawdads. The brisk cold of the mornings, followed by the horrific heat of the afternoons, made my only obstacle brittle and weak. Soon I was able to snap it off - and then? Oh, the mayhem ensued.
I can only thank Poseidon that they didn't think to use packing tape. I would have been ruined, I tell you! At least, until my next molt.
Since it was my admittedly foolish lack of discretion on my last blog that led to my capture last June, I will have to remain vague on a few things this time around; no more blogging about my exact location; no more video monologues with my brilliantly detailed charts laid out for your viewing pleasure.
But never fear, Clawdads! I will not leave you bewildered and alone for long. I have a big plan in the works. My think tank is being filtered as we speak, and dastardly deeds are afoot.
Clip, Snip, Conquer,
The Claw